disconnected ramblings

This dreary weather for the past 2 weeks or so is starting to get to me. I was really wishing today that I was in sunny California so I could go outside without having to put on a ton of clothing.

A conversation I was having earlier got me to thinking again about how much I want to travel and how I might possibly be able to do so in the near future. Sure I will be seeing over a hundred new places this summer, which sounds promising until I'm reminded of the fact that I will be seeing them for only about an hour as I ride on through them on my bike. Hopefully I'll get to explore at least a little bit in some of the cities.

Each day I'm wavering more and more about my decision to pursue flying after I graduate. It's got nothing to do with flying and everything to do with the fact that the military lifestyle is not one I want to live. I've wanted to fly more than anything my entire life, and always just considered the military as a means to an end, but I don't know if I can compromise myself that much for that long. Playing softball at Texas has given me some perspective on a similar situation. Although I don't regret playing for the 2 years I was there, I was definitely unhappy a large part of the time. I was playing the sport that I absolutely love, made great friends, and got to experience some once in a lifetime opportunities, but, obviously, I ultimately decided even those things were not worth my unhappiness. I could apply the same logic to flying, but in this case what scares me is that it would be a much larger--at least 4 year--commitment. And if I didnt' make the cut as a pilot I'd get thrown into something else which I most likely would dislike.

I recently have begun to be not so bummed out about the fact that some of my best friends have moved very far away from me--we're talking about opposite coasts--and today Wilson tells me she'll most likely be moving back to Houston in 6 months. Yeah it's just H-town, but what's a girl to do without her big sister?